What is normal?

My brain MRI shows no evidence of metastasis. Great news!

I am cancer free, no evidence of disease, just like I was a year ago.  Just like I was a year ago?  Back to normal, right?  I said to myself the other day, "I almost feel like myself again." Then I thought, "how can that be?"  I will never be the same as I was a year ago, pre diagnosis.  I am forever changed. I have new physical and mental scars. Some will fade and go away, others will always be visible.  Some may only be noticeable to me.

I have learned I am tougher than I thought I was. I have realized that I have more support from my friends than I could have imagined.  I appreciate that my family is truly amazing.  I know that Kelly will be by my side through anything, and he will carry me when I can't go any further.

My task now is to live my life, at least for the next three months when I have my next PET scan, and not worry about cancer. Never have I been so defined by a single description of myself (cancer patient) and occupied by a single thought (I have cancer) as I have been for the last year.  I guess it is understandable.  I have never engaged in battle with such a powerful force that is threatening to end my life. It is so hard (almost impossible some times) to think that I can stop fighting...at least for now. I'm afraid to put down my armor, I will be so exposed ...and it's been holding me up for what seems like such a long time. What protects you, when held too long, can become a crutch.

Some days are hard, some days are a little better. Wish me luck❤

Results

Kelly and I met with my oncologist in Bellingham yesterday to review the findings of my CT scan.  We were very relieved to hear that there is no evidence of metastatic disease on the CT scan.  I do have a nodule in my lung, a few cysts on my liver, and a few nodules on my thyroid.  I guess those are all relatively 'normal' and no one (radiologist and oncologist) seems to be concerned. I continue to have some unexplained nausea and dizziness. My oncologist has ordered an MRI of my brain to check for metastasis.  I am having the MRI tomorrow and we will get the results on Monday.  I am feeling very optimistic that the imaging will be unremarkable.
Thanks to all of you for continuing to hold me up and cheer me on.❤

One thing remains constant....change

It has been 6 weeks since my most recent surgery at UWMC. I would say that I am, physically, 90% healed. I am still dealing and learning to manage the effects of premature surgical menopause and all of the changes, responses and reactions that come with it. I am, of course, also still dealing with cancer, being cancer free and waiting for my cancer to come back. So many reactions/responses can be attributed to multiple issues; cancer, dealing with cancer, fear of recurrence of cancer, hypothyroidism, mild depression, hormone replacement therapy. Add to that the simple stress of everyday life. It is difficult, if not impossible, to compartmentalize. Cancer, still, invades almost all of my thoughts, everyday and every night.  I sometimes feel graced and empowered that I have made it this far. Kelly told me, some time go, that he did not think I would make it to my 40th  birthday. Wow!  Of course he is so happy that I, with a lot of help, could prove him wrong.  I wonder, how many other people are surprised that I'm still here. I sometimes can't decide what I believed was going to happen.  I guess I didn't think that far ahead, especially when things were really tough. You can only choose one direction, and it's out! Other times, I feel so incredibly unlucky to have received my diagnosis of cancer and all that has come and all that is yet to come with it. Somedays, I am so afraid, almost paralyzed with thoughts of recurrence. What would happen then I can only guess. A plan would be dependent on so many factors, all unknown at a time such as this.
Today I had a full body CT scan to check for recurrence.  We will get results on Wednesday evening. To be truthful, this is most nervous that I have ever been before a scan and while waiting for results. At times, I would even say terrified. I have been experiencing low grade nausea for the past week, fatigue, difficulty sleeping and have even lost a little weight. That last  part I would usually like, but it is now making me a bit nervous. All of these symptoms are most likely from stress. That being said, they are still unpleasant and disconcerting. I am trying to, as I always do, enjoy everyday, every event, and every person as much as I can. Sometimes it's easier than others:) Life is sweet and I really have all that I ever wanted and need right here❤

Safe!

This will be a short post. Just got the call from Dr. Urban.  I won't lie, my stomach flipped a couple of times as I answered the phone. She called with fantastic news, the pathologist found no abnormal or cancerous cells! Kelly and I are so relieved and happy.  Even though I am still recovering, I may need a glass of champagne to toast the news.  You can never have enough good news, and should never miss an opportunity to celebrate!

Rest, rest, rest...

My Surgery on Friday went well.  Dr. Urban removed my right ovary and Fallopian tube laproscopically as planned. While performing the surgery she did not see anything that she felt looked suspicious.  The frozen sections evaluated during surgery looked normal. All good news.  My surgery took about 2 hours. After surgery, I felt pretty nauseated, which is to be expected.  I slept a bit and Kelly picked up my prescriptions. I stayed in recovery until about 2:30. Once I could get up, walk around, use the restroom, I was discharged. Long drive home in traffic.  Since then I have been recovering at home, lots of couch time.  The pain was pretty intense the first couple of days, 4 incisions through abdominal muscles make almost everything difficult. Each day I feel a bit better.  Today after showering and getting dressed, however, I took a step backwards. Feeling pain, dizzy and nauseated. Time to lay down again. We are still waiting for the biopsy results from the pathologist, hoping to hear soon, thinking positively of course.

Heather

A planned surgery is better

We met with a team of Doctors yesterday, led by Dr. Urban. A gynecology oncologist. After reviewing my scans, performing an exam and a lot of discussion we have a plan for surgery. Dr. Urban feels that she will probably be removing benign tissue, but thinks it prudent to do so given my medical history. Dr. Urban will be able to evaluate the nature of these tissues (benign or malignant) during the surgery. If there is any cancerous tissue we change to plan 2, which is the removal of substantially more tissue, which require a more invasive surgery. We are feeling confident and positive. We know that we are in expert hands. Surgery is scheduled today at 5:30am aat UWMC. It is now 5:04. We better get to the hospital. Heather

There's only one way to know for sure

It is ironic that as I walked the Survivor lap at the Relay for Life last Friday I started to have some abdominal pain. I thought I just had a little stomach ache, not too unusual. My discomfort, however, lasted through the weekend. By Monday, I started to realize that this was a feeling I had felt before. This was the same pain/discomfort that I had last summer that we didn't know the origin of until I ended up in the emergency room. Based on ultrasound findings, it appears that I may have another ovarian cyst, or cysts. With my history of melanoma in my left ovary, melanoma is suspected in these cysts on my remaining right ovary. We will be returning to SCCA this Thursday for another scan, a consult/pre-op, and pre-anesthesia appointments. I will, almost certainly, have surgery on Friday to have a procedure called a bilateral salpingo oophorectomy (surgery to remove my right ovary and both fallopian tubes). These will be biopsied to determine if there is melanoma present. I have no idea, at this point, how we will proceed if there is any cancer present. We are feeling optimistic. I will be in expert hands at the SCCA and UWMC. I have beaten the odds so far and I don't intend to quit anytime soon!

Is that an elephant in the room?

It continues!!!  This last week there has been a cloud hanging over our heads. We didn't know if it was a black cloud or a happy cloud, we just knew it was there.  Following us around. Sometimes we would talk about it, most of the time we did our best to ignore it.  I'm, of course, talking about the three month PET scan. It happened on Wednesday morning, and we had an appointment yesterday afternoon to get the results.  We knew it had to be good news, but we still couldn't make out the color of that cloud... Well, it was great news!!! Heather continues to show no evidence of disease!!  We are amazed, doctors are dumbfounded. People with metastatic melanoma just don't respond this well. I can't believe how fortunate we are and how strong Heather has been through this battle.  The cloud remains, as Heather has said, "Melanoma doesn't fight fair." but right now she is winning and the cloud is happy and even letting some sun peak through. It will still follow us around, however, we can forget about it for a few months. The next scan is not scheduled yet, but will be sometime in September.  Probably won't be a whole lot of posts between now and then, but we know and feel all of the support we have out there. Thank you so much!!! Know that Heather will be spending the summer enjoying every minute, and continuing to win!!

Surviving

Today marks seven weeks NED (no evidence of disease). My next PET scan is in a month, and I am starting to get nervous. Sometimes it seems almost like I never even had cancer. It is a strange memory mixed with new self-identification mixed with a blurry understanding that it might not be over. I am balancing on the edge. Over one edge is the painful memory, which is not really a memory but more of a permanent piece of me. Over the other edge is a palpable pressure to live all of the lessons I’ve learned. I am stuck here in the middle. I am afraid of never being able to move forward. I am afraid of moving forward too fast and forgetting all of the lessons I have learned. What right do I have to feel sorry for myself when I am, so far, being given the ultimate gift? My treatment is working. I am experiencing what every patient hopes for and I am not grateful enough. I am balancing on the edge between life and death, while at the same time struggling to remember that it is even part of my life. I am constantly trying to define my new self. I evaluate every one of my actions, thoughts, emotions, to determine how it fits into this new life. Death has introduced himself to me. He occupies my thoughts, reminding me that no matter how “back-to-normal” my life may seem, I have forever lost control.  There is no escape. All I can do is fight, and for that, I am so grateful.

What a ride!

Six months ago I was diagnosed with metastatic melanoma. Unbelievable. What's even more unbelievable is that my most recent PET scan shows no evidence of disease.
I feel a mixture, sometimes roller coaster of emotions: joy, disbelief, amazement, shock, relief, exhaustion, and even guilt.
For now, I am winning. However, melanoma isn't a fair opponent. It plays by it's own rules, and sometimes (most of the time) plays dirty.
I am sure, at least for a while, I will feel as if I am looking over my shoulder, waiting...watching...wondering. Melanoma may want to play again. Hopefully, it is done with me.
I feel extremely fortunate, exceptionally lucky. My treatments worked. It wasn't easy, but I know that my story could be so very different.

Thanks to all for your support, love, and prayers.

Heather

It's been a long time...

It has been a long time since my last post. I apologize for not keeping you all up to date. However, there has not been a whole lot of new, news.

In my last blog entry I explained that my cardiologist had requested a cardiac MRI. I had that completed in early February and got the results about one month later. Basically, my heart function is healthy in every way. The MRI does show some 'moderate circumferential pericardial effusion with no evidence of tamponade'. Fluid around my heart but not enough to impair function. 'Trivial bilateral pleural effusions'. Small amount of fluid around my lungs.
'Three small, less than .6 cm areas of hyperenhancement in the basal anterior wall concerning for either inflammation or potentially mid myocardial metasteses'. Three lesions, the origin of which is very hard to discern, especially because there was no imaging of my heart in the staging process. However, if these lesions were present than, it is my understanding that IL 2 would still have been the treatment of choice.

All of my doctors feel that the likelihood is high that all of these abnormalities can be traced back to my IL 2 treatment, and as such are transient, and will disappear eventually. My cardiologist, Dr. Beglin, has requested another echocardiogram in June. Hopefully, all will be back to normal at that point.

I have my next PET scan this Friday March 23rd. We should get result early next week. We anticipate good news, however, anxiety always creeps in. We will meet with Dr. Rubin, my oncologist in Bellingham, on Monday. I hope to hear from Dr. Margolin, my oncologist in Seattle, next week as well. Good news or not, I would like a plan.

I have been feeling pretty well physically. Emotionally, I feel as if I am the same person, however I feel inexplicably changed forever. Physical pain is so much easier to push through.

I am so frequently reminded how fortunate I am for all that I have. Too many things, and people to list! Even on the bad days(and there aren't many),I can never forget that.

Thank you all for continuing to support us!

Fingers crossed for Friday,

Heather

There's always a 'but'...

It's Saturday, I have been home for almost a week. I feel marginal. I have lost 40 pounds since Sunday. Looking forward to feeling great soon!

Tuesday Dr. Margolin called and explained to me that she did not want me to have anymore IL 2 treatment. She feels the risk of me having more cardiac complications is too high. I figured that would be her opinion. I have to say, I was both relieved and saddened by this news. IL 2 treatment is awful but it worked for me. I feel like my best treatment has been taken off the table. It probably sounds strange.

I now have a cardiologist! After my most recent episode at the UWMC, a cardiac follow up was recommended. Thursday Kelly and I met with cardiologist Dr. Beglin. He reviewed my medical history and expressed his desire to help me treat my cancer most effectively. Dr. Beglin performed his exam and viewed an electrocardiogram(ECG) of my heart. Based on what he saw there he ordered an echocardiogram. He explained that he wanted it done soon so that he could give results as soon as possible. So, later that day, we came back for my echo. This test takes about a half an hour, no big deal. Apparently, I had an echo in the hospital in November. This is just another thing I don't remember.

Dr. Beglin called yesterday afternoons to let me know what the echo revealed. He explained to me that my heart function looks totally normal but there's just one thing....
There is some inflammation around the lining of my heart, the pericardium. This isn't surprising, this lining responds to the IL 2 like the rest of my body. However, Dr. Beglin explained, the are 1 or 2 spots that he can't see very well on the echo. To get a more detailed view he would like an MRI of my heart.

So, sometime next week (hopefully) I will have an MRI of my heart. Most likely, these small lesions are just inflammation from my treatment. There is a possibility that they could be cancer. Great! Lesions around the heart aren't detectable on a PET scan because of the way that scan works.

Today is a beautiful, sunny day! My sisters are coming up to visit for the afternoon! I have more to be thankful for than to complain about!

Until next time....

Exhausted!

I am so glad to be home. Rested on the couch all last night. Kelly unloaded the car and did all the laundry. We watched the Superbowl, me mostly with my eyes closed.

I didn't sleep well, unfortunateley, That's ok because I am only going to sleep today, right?

Kelly has planned to go golfing with some friends. It's a beauriful day! I am, not surprisingly, emotional and very tired. But, I am happy and prepared to hang out at home. I take my morning lasix and potassium, to help push off excess water. Kelly suggests I take a couple Ativan to help with me settle down. So I do. However Kelly quickly realizes that I probably should not be home alone. I accidentally took 2 more lasix, while not life threatenening, are sure sign that I am out of it. Now I feel even worse. For those of you that don't already know, Kelly is a saint, as least he is for me;)

We have an appoitment with cardiologist on Thursday to evaluate my heart thouroughly. I am interested to see what they discover. We are scheduled to go back to the UW next Monday to start the 2nd cycle unless the cardiologist and/or Dr. Margolin feel the risks of further cardiac incidents outweigh the benefits of the IL 2 treatment.

It's the limbo!

Feeling pretty good now. Just big and tired!!

Heather

Surprise!!!

Heather had a tough time sleeping last night. She developed an expiratory wheeze in her throat, that medically was no big deal, but it was so noisy that it was keeping her awake.

That's the bad news. She did manage to get a few hours of sleep, and her vitals stayed very stable through the night. We got up around 8:00 and the barrage of good news began!!

Heather had a repeat swab of her nose done on Friday to recheck for MRSA. Results this morning... negative! The PA came in shortly after and said things were looking pretty good and that we were probably going to be able to go home tomorrow. Not ideal, but still good news.

Next, came the nurse to unhook all the IV lines, BP cuff, EKG lines, etc. because Heather was being upgraded from "ICU" care to "floor" care. More good news. Heather was tired, but felt pretty good, so she decided to take a shower. Not long after finishing her shower, the PA returned with the doctor, and they were both surprised how good she looked. They hardly hesitated before they asked if she felt like she wanted to go home.

Not something Heather had to be asked twice about!!! She is still exhausted, but would much prefer to recover on her couch at home rather than a hospital bed. So, about an hour later, we were in the car and on our way to Bellingham!! I suppose this may come as a bit of bad news to a few of you, because it means no kegger in the ICU. :)

We made it home. Traffic was good, Heather slept all the way and continues to slumber on the couch. The laundry is done, the roasted chicken is on the counter, the super bowl is on, I'm in my PJs, Lola is asleep right next to Heather and the wine glass is full.

So good to be home!!!!

Stabilized

Today... Much better. Heather was most understandably exhausted after all she went through yesterday. She managed to sleep pretty well last night and has been dozing in and out today. 

She ended up getting quite a bit of IV fluids during the events of yesterday, which led to a fair amount of fluid leaking into her "3rd space." So a lot of extra swelling today.  Just more fluid to get rid of before we come back. 

So, looks like we may be able to head home tomorrow, however everyone that has come to talk to us today has been suggesting that we are most likely not leaving until Monday.  

Heather continues to recover, she has little memory of what went on yesterday, but does remember both the adenosine and getting shocked. She said she doesn't really want to experience either of them anytime in the near future :)

Well, here's to an ICU super bowl party. Not sure if they will let me bring the keg up...

It couldn't be that easy

After a rough day, Heather finally got the right combination of drugs and managed to get some much needed sleep last night. She did get her 2:00 AM dose overnight, and then got her 10:00 dose this morning. Her side effects had eased off, and she was feeling good (relatively speaking).

Just prior to the doctors coming in this morning, she had a short run of SVT (heart sped up to about 170 beats per minute). This only lasted for about 10 seconds and then settled into a normal rate. The doctors had seen this, and came in and told her that they were going to hold off on her dose at 6:00 this evening, because her heart was beginning to show signs of irritation. 

Believe or not, Heather was ok with that decision. It's been a long week and this meant maybe we could be going home tomorrow, or at least by Sunday. 

But...

The doctors left the room, she stood up to go to the bathroom and her heart sped up again. By the time she was back from the bathroom, her heart rate was now over 230 beats per minute. Needless to say, this got the attention of everyone. Quickly her room was filled with about 10 doctors, nurses, cardiologists, etc.  She remained conscious and talking, but this was a little more serious than our last trip down when her heart sped up. 

For the next two hours, Heather was wrung through the wringer. Fortunately, she was pretty sedated.  They first tried a drug called Adenosine, which is a very short lived drug that is like a chemical shock to the heart. The idea being to temporarily block the electrical activity in the heart and hope it resets into a regular rhythm. Two tries, no success. Heather, however, got to feel what it would be like to have her heart stop.... Twice. 

Well, the chemical shock didn't work... On to electricity. After much more sedation, Heather got to receive two separate electrical shocks to her chest (elctrocardioversion). Unfortunately without success.  Heather now has a good idea what it would feel like to be kicked in the chest by a horse..... Twice. :(

Back to drugs. Different drugs this time, a little less dramatic, but typically don't work as quickly as the previous interventions should.  The good news, though, is they did work. About three hours after her heart sped up, it slowed back down and became regular again.  

No question about the 6:00 IL-2 now, and, no 2:00 AM dose Saturday morning. So she is done with the IL-2 for this trip down. 11/14 doses and a little excitement for the 8NE ICU. Slim chance we may get to leave Saturday.  Most likely Sunday, or early Monday. 

Glad to have this round pretty much behind us.  Looking forward to a week at home for recovery and preparation for the next trip down on February 13. 

Oh, I remember you...

Well, Heather had seemingly been breezing through this round as compared to her last two trips down. Despite having to skip her 6th dose due to a low BP, the side effects have been fairly easy to manage thus far.  She received her 7th and 8th dose without much trouble, even managed to sleep quite a bit last night.

But...

Today brought on the tirade of side effects.  Confusion, hallucinations, itchiness, nausea, and severe abdominal cramping.  It's quite apparent that her body has finally recognized the familiar invader...IL-2.  

During conversations with the doctors earlier today, I got the feeling that they may offer and even encourage Heather to skip a dose this evening based on the onslaught of side effects she was having. During a lucid moment this afternoon, I broached this possibility with Heather... She looked at me as if I were insane. So once again, in the face of great suffering, Heather says, "Bring it on!!" 

Doses 9 and 10 were completed, and her vital signs seem to holding steady enough that she should get her 11th dose at 2:00 in the morning.  She's staying strong and nearing the end of this leg.  

Thanks for all the thoughts and words of encouragement. 

MRSA. The new four letter word.

Everyone who gets admitted to the hospital has to run a little swab in their nose, which is then sent to the lab and cultured to see if it contains MRSA. Heather did this when we checked in on Monday and we found out that she actually brought some MRSA in to the hospital. 

Initially sounds scary, until you step back and realize that MRSA is everywhere. I'm sure I brought some in too.  I've heard of studies that have shown recliners in fire halls are ripe with the stuff. It's on everything we touch, which is why hand-washing is such a good idea. 

Well, that was easy for me to wrap my brain around, but mine is not clouded with IL-2, Demerol, Ativan, etc. Poor Heather thought this meant the end, not that she was sick with some infection, but that they were going to end her treatment and essentially kick us out.  Not the case, but not an easy thing to convince her of. Truly, the only reason the nurse told her was to help explain why everyone now had to wear a yellow robe around her. Yep, including me. Yellow robe when in the room, take it off when I leave. (Is it like a kilt? Do I have to wear anything under it?)

Well, we finally convinced her that it really was no big deal. She even gets to wear a "Fancy" yellow robe when she leaves the room for a little walk through the halls. Phheeewwww!!!!

She made it through the night pretty well after that.  She received her 5th dose at 2:00 AM, and even managed a few hours of sleep. Then, took the news really well at about 9:00 when she was told that she wasn't going to get the 6th dose at 10:00. BP too low, but being supported well by the Neo. 

Other than trying to keep from crawling out of her skin, fairly relaxing day, which will typically lower most people's BP, but Heather managed to raise hers.  Last one was 103/62 and she is on a low dose of the pressor, so.... the good news.... more IL-2 at 6:00!!!  Back on schedule. Yippee!

Looking forward to hitting the half way point of this trip. 6/7 doses down, 7 left!

Are you really there?

Day two is drawing to a close. Things have been going pretty well so far, however, Heather is beginning to lose control of her fingers, so I will be taking over the blog for awhile. 

She has talked to a few people that haven't been in the room, but one person she mentioned on facebook today was actually here. We were just paid a visit from King 5's "Jesse Jones" 

Jesse has kidney cancer, and the treatment for kidney cancer is IL-2. He went through the same treatment as Heather about a year ago. I read an article about it in Pacific Northwest Golfer a couple of months ago after Heather's first trip down here. 

Today, I happened to ask Heather's nurse if he was working when Jesse was down here, which he was. Several hours later the nurse came in and told me to stick around because Jesse Jones was on the way in to visit our neighbor. 

So, 20 minutes later, Jesse Jones stopped by to chat with us before his visit next door. Heather and Jesse exchanged a few IL-2 stories and he offered her up some words of encouragement. He was very impressed that Heather had made it through two rounds and was back for two more. 

Anyway, back to our Heather.  She is handling the first few doses very well.  Starting to get a bit itchy and red.  Also, getting the "jimmy legs" a bit too.  The drugs to combat the side effects are working well so far.  She was able to sleep most of the afternoon.  Her blood pressure has slowly been dropping since we got here and finally got low enough that she was put on the "pressor" medication, "Neo." She was still able to receive her 4th dose of IL-2 at 6:00.  4 for 4!!

We have been told several times that she definitely won't make all 14 doses this time, but we all know Heather... She still plans on all 14!! Next dose scheduled for 2:00 AM.

"Kelly D." not King 5 news...

Off and Running

Today has been a very busy day!  Fortunately, everything  has gone smoothly.

I had my apheresis this morning at the Puget Sound Blood Center.  My appointment took about 4 hours.  They removed about 200 cc's of white blood cells (leukocytes). We then carried them in a cooler to SCCA.  Who else gets to do that!? Those cells will be frozen for possible use later if needed.  

We met with Dr. Margolin at SCCA, went over the plan.  Simple plan, kick some butt again!

My room in the ICU wasn't ready at 1:00. I wasn't surprised.  That actually gave us time to grab some lunch. Perfect.

I called the UW while we were at lunch and was told we could get in at 2:00.  Again, perfect. 

So, with  a full tummy, we head to the hospital.  We got through admissions quickly and  into a room. Another room with a view. We met with the nurse and nurse practitioner, checked vitals, now it's time to get my PICC line placed.  That went great.  A little ouchy but what can you do? Off to get a x-ray to check  PICC placement. Spot on. Back to my room to wait.

I got my first dose of IL 2 at 6:15.  Felt pretty good, waiting.....after about an hour, low and behold, I am super uncomfortable. Crawl out of my skin uncomfortable!  Nurse Helen to the rescue! Demerol!! 

Instantly, I feel so much better!!

Just had some dinner, probably won't be hungry after today.

Next dose at 2 am!! It's going to be great!

Thanks for all the well wishes and words of encouragement!!!!

Heather

Here we go again...

Well, as I said in the last post, the doctors said, "It worked so good last time, so 'let's' do it again.". So, here we are again, in a hotel in Seattle, just had a great night out (Primo's on 8th is great btw) and tomorrow it all starts again.

I'm a bit nervous, anxious, mildly nauseated, etc. I'm elated that the treatment worked so well last time and am ready to stomp on the cancer while it is down, but.... It's sure was nice feeling back to normal. I was to the point that I could go well over three hours without thinking about this terrible disease 😊. Now it will all be thrust back on us.

It is a bit harder going in this time because I feel so good, but at the same time, I know that the disease is still there, and this is the best plan of attack.

Thanks so much for all the thoughts and words of encouragement. It truly does help me get through this stuff. I (we) will keep you posted thorough this next round of treatment.

Tomorrow will be a busy day!

The plan as of today

After conferring over the phone and through emails, the plan is to go to te Puget Sound Blood Center(PSBC) on January 30th early morning, then to the UW to check into the ICU in the afternoon.

At the PSBC I will be undergoing leukaphersis procedure. In the process I will have 2 large bore IV's placed, one in each arm. My blood will be drawn from one arm to a machine. The machine will separate out and collect white blood cells (leukocytes). The machine will then return the remainder of my blood to me through the 2nd IV. This will take 3-4 hours. This procedure is being performed as a part of a research study. My collected white blood cells will be used to grow T cells. These T cells will, in the lab, be 'trained' to recognize my melanoma. This will be done using a sample from my tumor that has had some genetic testing performed on it. These T cells may at some point be given back to me to see if my immune system can recognize and fight my cancer. The modified T cells would, if used, be used in conjunction with a medication. At this point, probably ipilimamab. So, right now, it is just a collection process. The T cells will be saved for some time down the road when I may need them.

Next, I am scheduled to check into the ICU, UW at 1:00 pm. Hopefully a bed will be available. You just never know?

I will undergo the same treatment sequence as last time. Around 5 days in ICU receiving IL2, about 9 days at home, about 5 more days in the ICU, then home to recover. I am so hoping my blood pressure stays high enough, my heart rate stays low and regular, my breathing is good, and that I leave my PICC line alone. What else, well I guess I'd like it to be easy. How's that for a wish!

I know what to expect, ths is a blessing and a curse. At least I will know that IL 2 works for me as I endure the discomfort of the treatment.

I am looking forward to seeing some good friends and family before I start treatment again. I know that I probably won't remember most of February, such a strange feeling. You can probably look forward to some incoherent texts and or posts. I hope they make you laugh.

I appreciate all the love, support, inquiry and positive energy that I get everyday from all of you!!!

Heather

Believe it!

It's been awhile since my last post and I have some new, good news!

I had another PET scan on Wednesday the 11th and just went to my oncologist in Bellingham, Dr. Rubin, on Friday. We looked over the report and the images from my scan. The 2 lesions that were present and actively taking up glucose in December are now smaller and not active. "No persistent abnormal FDG activity within the previously noted subcutaneous nodules." This is of course fantastic news! Also, the report states there is no new metastatic disease.

I have now read the report maybe ten times! It just doesn't seem real. Although I know that it is. Kelly and I could not be happier. It is still scary, I can't help but wonder when it will come back. But, I can't live worrying about things I can't control. I am doing my best at that.

So, because the IL 2 worked so well for me, Dr. margolin has 'offered' me another round. We are going for it! It may seem crazy, but I am glad to have he opportunity for more IL 2. I feel that it worked so well, why not kick my cancer while it is down. Maybe it will then stay away for even longer. I'm not saying that I will enjoy it.

Dr. Margolin also has asked if I will participate in a clinical trial. I dont know much about the trial at this point. I am going to participate and I will certainly learn more about it soon. I will also start IL 2 soon. Date yet to be determind. Of course all of this comes on a holiday weekend. Another lesson in patience for me. Next week will be filled with calls, planning, and maybe appointments. Here we go again.

I feel great! I feel strong! I am ready to fight again!

Lots to think about. Lots to celebrate!